


Anxiety attack

by lilacspirit



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Anxiety Attacks, Fluff, Friendship/Love, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-10-23
Updated: 2014-10-23
Packaged: 2018-02-22 07:32:08
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,145
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2499683
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lilacspirit/pseuds/lilacspirit
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>“What’s the matter?” Tsukishima asked raising an eyebrow at his friend.<br/>“What? Oh, nothing Tsuki!” Yamaguchi gave him his best smile.<br/>Tsukishima stared, obviously doubtful of his friend’s reply, “Don’t get angry at yourself, it’s just volleyball.”<br/>“I know...but,” he swallowed, “Everyone is trying so hard and I can’t even serve the ball over the net. I’m not good enough to be on the team…”<br/>“Shut up Yamaguchi.”<br/>He looked at the floor after Tsuki’s words, “Sorry…”</p>
            </blockquote>





	Anxiety attack

The ball had a made a flop noise as it hit the net, falling to the ground in front of his teammates.  There was sounds of them shouting, “Nice try!” and, “Once more!” but Yamaguchi heard none of it.

Again. He failed it again.

As he walked over to the side of the gym and leaned back on the wall, the anxieties started to set in. Failure, the word repeated in his head; Failure, Burden, Idiot, Ugly-

“Yamaguchi.”

Hearing his name he looked up to the tall blonde boy with glasses glaring down at him.

“What’s the matter?” Tsukishima asked raising an eyebrow at his friend.

“What? Oh, nothing Tsuki!” Yamaguchi gave him his best smile.

Tsukishima stared, obviously doubtful of his friend’s reply, “Don’t get angry at yourself, it’s just volleyball.”

“I know...but,” he swallowed, “Everyone is trying so hard and I can’t even serve the ball over the net. I’m not good enough to be on the team…”

“Shut up Yamaguchi.”

He looked at the floor after Tsuki’s words, “Sorry…”

 

After a moment or two, the shoes in front of him turned on the heel and moved back towards the court muttering something. Practice was about to be over, Yamaguchi watched Kageyama and Hinata taking down the net while Nishinoya and Tanaka raced each other in who could sweep the gym the fastest. They didn’t even notice that he was still standing next to the wall; nobody called out to him to help and were chattering away to each other.

_They don’t need me_ …the freckled boy thought to himself.

He slowly slinked outside through the door and towards the club room to get his stuff. Crickets chirped as the stairs groaned under his shoes, it was a nice night considering practice had made Yamaguchi feel like the most pathetic person on earth.  The anxiety building up from before had reached his stomach making him feel sick and made breathing hard. Quickly he opened the door to the club room, closing it behind him, and crumbled to the floor.

 This hadn’t happened for a long time, not since middle school but it felt like everything was finally falling on top of him. He remembered the feeling well though, the way his stomach felt like a sack of bricks, the quick beating of his heart and how it felt like someone had stuck cotton down his throat making it hard to breath. And finally the tears fell from his eyes, dropping silently on the carpet as he sobbed and gasped for air.

Deep breathes, he need to do deep breathes before anyone came back but the cotton wouldn’t leave his throat making him hack and cough when he tried. His nose started leaking as he kept trying to get his breathing right while wiping his sleeves over his face to make less of a mess. It seemed just to make it worse though when his view was smudged by tears and his nose kept sniffling anyway. He was such a-

 

“Mess.”

A voice came from the door and Yamaguchi jumped back from the place he was sitting on the ground to look up. It was the last person he wanted to see him like this.

“Tsuki!” he gasped, staring at the blonde before realizing what he said before- mess. He must have looked awful and his eyes were probably red and puffy by now.

“Please don’t look at me” he pleaded as he roughly wiped over his eyes again, “I’m a mess like you said. I’m sorry Tsuki, just give me a sec to clean up and we can go home.”

Before Tsukishima could say something Yamaguchi stood up surprisingly fast and rushed over to his locker to get his bag and sling it over his shoulder.

“You’re still in your gym clothes.” Tsukishima pointed out.

“Ah…” He looked down at his clothes, “Oh your right…my bad Tsuki I’m so stupid.”

He quickly began to remove his shirt when he heard a tsk noise and a hand grabbed his wrist.

“Don’t you dare say that.” The tall boy growled. He glared down at Yamaguchi, the way he looked at him made tears sting at his eyes again, “Sorry Tsuki…”

“Stop saying sorry all the damn time,” Tsukishima snapped, “You don’t have anything to be sorry for goddamn it!”

The hand on Yamaguchi’s wrist loosened, he had to hold his tongue to make sure he didn’t say sorry again by accident.

“When I ask you if you’re alright…” Tsukishima whispered, “Why don’t you tell me?”

“I...”

“Look I know I’m not a good friend but-“

“You are!” Yamaguchi shouted, surprising the both of them, “You are a good friend, my best friend!”

“Then why don’t you tell me how your feeling?!”

“Because!” Tears flowed down Yamaguchi’s face once again as he forced himself to look at his friends face, “Because I don’t want to bother you! Because I don’t want to be a burden to you! I’m…scared I’ll lose you Tsuki.”

 

There was silence between the two boys and Tsuki finally let go of Yamaguchi’s arm. Yamaguchi closed his eyes, had it finally come to this? Is this where he’ll lose his best friend and be all alone again? He was scared if he opened his eyes the tall, blonde, glassed boy would gone from his sights forever.

Tsukishima pulled Yamaguchi into his arms and put his hand on his head- slowly patting the long shaggy hair of his friend. Yamaguchi widened his eyes as he felt the warmth of Tsuki’s chest. He fumbled with his arms and lightly held the edges of the boys t-shirt in front of him, “Tsuki?”

 “You can…let it all out if you want,” Tsukishima mumbled into Yamaguchi’s ear, “Like if you want to complain, just do it. If you want to cry or get angry or whatever just…do it. I’ll listen to it all, I don’t care if you think it’s annoying or not.”

There was awkwardness in his voice and he wasn’t making eye contact with Yamaguchi. But hearing such kind words from someone who makes fun of teammates and strangers, a person who is known as rude and inconsiderate was comforting him.

His best friend.

 

He took his hands of Tsukishima’s sides and wrapped his arms around him; he knew that Tsuki’s face would be reddening from the recent words and now from the new contact. He didn’t let go of Yamaguchi though but he tapped his shoulder gently, “Are you done crying now?”

“Mm,” was the only reply he got, muffled by his own shirt.

“We should start heading back before everyone else gets here.”

“Mm”

“Is that all you’re going to say now?”

Yamaguchi shook his head as he let go of Tsuki, wiping his hand across his face one last time and smiled up at him,

“Thank you, Tsuki.”

**Author's Note:**

> So...this is the first fanfiction I've written since I was 13, so please go easy on me! It's been about six years but a new friend of mine inspired me to get back into it. She also introduced me to haikyuu in which these two dorks are from. I wouldn't say they're my OTP or anything...but they're relationship is something I adore and love. I hope they look after each other for a long time~


End file.
